Overcompensating to make a relationship work is mentally draining – Betty Irabor
Mental Health Advocate, Betty Irabor, has cautioned unmarried people against making sacrifices in their relationships with the anticipation of a favorable outcome.
The founder of Genevieve mag shared a thread on her Twitter account. In the thread Mrs Betty Irabor was of the opinion that making sacrifices in a relationship should be willing and not with the goal for compelling the other party’s emotions to do ones commands.
She pinpointed that overcompensation to make a relationship work can be ‘mentally draining.’
Read the tweets below;
“Was having a “Counselling” session with a young lady the other day and she wouldn’t stop talking about how her ex of 18 months used and dumped her after all she sacrificed for him.”
“While this is very unfortunate, I would like to say that every relationship is a risk and there are no guarantees that most will lead to marriage even when he has put a ring on it.”
“Sacrificing for your boyfriend, girlfriend, lover or husband should be a choice or decision you make without expecting to be rewarded for it. It should be voluntary.”
“Many people expect these ‘sacrifices’ to influence favourable emotions, loyalty, commitment but we all know how some of these have played out. Many mothers gave up their dreams for their “intended” in those days;”
“Took on extra jobs to give their partners opportunities, good education and still ended up with nothing.
My take on this is; if you are making all those your ‘sacrifices’ to force a reciprocity of your affection with the intent to take your relationship to the next level.”
“You may be setting yourself up for a heartbreak and these types of unhappy endings…
There are no “sacrifices” that can force anyone who is not ready to be with you to be with you.”
“Those ‘sacrifices’; your money, your time, your affection and playing wife will be nothing but ‘SAARA’ (which means an act of generosity in Yoruba language)
Overcompensating to make a relationship work is mentally draining.”
“It takes two to have a healthy relationship. If you are the only one doing the giving and adjusting to fit into your partner’s schedule then you are in a relationship all by Yourself.”
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